No, No, No!!!!!

It can't be true. It just can't!!!!!

That trailer was so good... I had a feeling it might not last....

Doesn't LC realize that I (along with some OTHER people I know in bloggyland) live vicariously through her?!?!

Great.

Now what?

Updates, Updates, Updates

I was just coming back from lunch with two of my friends and we passed KC (you remember her?) as she was leaving our building.

She was talking to herself.

Yes. Definitely Just Plain Weird.

****** ****** *******

Jillian and I did not hang out this morning before work, because I didn’t sleep well last night due to a coughing child and a brain that wouldn’t stop thinking about babysitter issues (more on that later). Oh, and also because I can’t lift my feet more than three inches off the ground.

Yeah, that Jillian’s a real bitch.

It looks so good...

...I can't even stand it!!!!!

The Hills starts up again in March and THIS TRAILER is so freaking awesome!!!!!

Do they have meds for this?

This morning I ran into a girl that I know in the bathroom. We don’t know each other well, she’s a friend of a friend. And she’s muuuuuch younger than me to the tune of about 12 years (I can’t believe I work with someone TWELVE years younger – I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit). And she’s a little odd in that I can’t figure out if she is quiet/shy or just plain weird. But, we’ve been to a couple of Happy Hours together, so we are more than “I’ve seen you around here” kind of co-workers. I won’t name names, but her name might sound exactly like the letters KC.

Anyhoo, I ran into her in the bathroom this morning and she was all, “Oh, do you work on this floor now?” We chatted oh-so-briefly and then went our separate ways.

I just went to the bathroom (the first stall was occupied, but the 3rd – my favorite! – was empty). When I came out of the stall area to the sink area, KC was out there washing her hands. And so I said, “Hi again!” Because, you know, I’m polite like that.

And do you want to know what happened?

She made eye contact with me in the mirror and then….

Nothing.
She didn’t say “Hi,” “Kiss my rear,” nothing.
She proceeded to dry her hands and leave the restroom.
Without. Saying. A. Word.
It was like I wasn’t even there.

Guess that answers MY question.

Definitely Just Plain Weird.

Please don't take my Carolla away from me.

Thank you sucky economy and thank you sucky CBS. This morning was the last day of the Adam Carolla Show broadcast. His show has been cancelled due to $$. In fact, the entire station has been cancelled. So, thanks CBS.

Adam may be a somewhat judgemental atheist but I LIKED him. And Teresa may occasionally be an annoying know-it-all, but I LIKED her. Bald Brian, well, I’ve got no complaints about him.

But the point is, this is how I start my morning. You just took away my coffee. And everyone around me will probably be suffering the consequences the same as they would any co-worker whose morning caffeine was robbed from them.

Thanks. You suck.

ETA: I should go back home and get in bed. Not only did my kid steal my apple from me this morning, but I just went to fill up my water bottle and the damn water cooler is empty. This day is going to be frustrating. Curses and hexes on you, CBS.

E(again)TA: One bright spot in my morning...I still have some generic Crystal Light packets to mix in with my fountain water so it doesn't taste as gross. YEA (But that doesn't mean I'm taking back my curses and hexes on CBS. They still suck.)

What Could This Possibly Mean?

I am the Queen of Bizarro Dreams. They can get pretty trippy sometimes.

Last night’s dreams weren’t so much trippy as they were just plain weird and random. I won’t bore you with the details of the four day trip to London which included me complaining about not getting to see Big Ben and Parliament (and, yes, making a lame Chevy Chase/European Vacation joke), missing the flight back, and then driving through the somewhat post-apocalyptic English Countryside. That was nothing.

The strange dream was the one where I realized that Hubby had decided that he had imprinted (you Twilight fans know what I’m talking about) on a 20-something gal and that he didn’t want to be married to me anymore. So what did I do? I enlisted the help of the guy that was dumped by the 20-something gal. We decided that we would act like we were okay with the whole imprinting thing and then make Hubby and Gal believe that we were in love with each other in the hopes of making them jealous. The Object of My Fake Affection?

Bret Michaels.

Hey, don’t judge me. He wasn’t wearing that stupid bandana and had on very little guyliner. Trust me, he was way hotter in my dream than in real life.

…seriously. Where does this crap come from??

Just a little pimpin'

Go see this BLOG. I may or may not be related to the chick writing it.

Good Deeds

Borrowed this idea from Coco, who borrowed it from Belle.

I’m a big believer in karma, grace, serendipity…whatever you choose to call it. Paying it forward in its simplest terms. I have grace shown to me all the time, in such numerous ways it’s impossible to count. Yesterday, I went to a Bible Study at the Portland Art Museum hosted by a local church (man, was it good!). That free fruit definitely felt like grace to me.

What I love best about the giving and receiving of grace is the butterfly effect that it has. And that is where FAITH comes into grace. I have faith that if I do something kind and unselfish, then it will be the precipitator for another act of kindness which I may not see.

So, because yesterday I was given free fruit at the Bible Study, I gave my fruit this morning to the woman on the corner who told me she was hungry. Even if it stops right there, I don’t care, because by paying it forward, I honored the efforts of others who fed my stomach and fed my soul.

Bad Weather

I'm hearing about the bad weather in my beloved Oklahoma today. Hoping my family and all my friends - IRL and in Bloggyland - are staying safe........

It Ain't Easy Being Green

It’s gray and rainy. The weather definitely fits my mood. I’m very sad about Cora, I’ve got a hangover, I’m hungry and this day is just dragging, dragging, dragging.

So, I’ll do the only thing I can - I’ll amuse myself.

Hubby pays attention to gas prices. A LOT of attention to be exact. And because we are together for our commutes, I pay attention to the gas prices, too. So, here’s the deal…

If the price per barrel keeps going d-o-w-n, why in the world does nobody seem bothered by the fact that gas prices keep going up? I DO NOT GET IT.

So, today, Hubby decided we are buying a Prius. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’ve got nothing against Priuseseses (I wonder of the plural of Prius is like the dice/die scenario. Prius/Priui, maybe?) and I think the whole hybrid/green thing is great. But, I love my BMW. Yes, it gets terrible gas mileage, but it looks great.

You wouldn’t think I’d be so picky because, once we realized what great MPG we were getting out of the Snowbeast, we pretty much started driving it all the time. I mean, if I can cruise around in the THIS (no longer with a duct taped mirror...because we finally just took the damn mirror off!) why would I have a problem with a Prius? Is it because it’s a hatchback? I don’t know. I just don’t know. There’s just something about it that I have an aversion to.

So, I’m going to suggest some Hybrid Alternatives to Hubby. But, I’ll be honest. My idea of being “green” is only using two paper towels in the restroom to dry my hands, instead of three.

I think if we buy a Prius, we also have to buy one of these for the bumper:

Prediction for Monday Morning

Hungover. Totally Hungover.

I didn't eat much today, just nibblies. And then met Hubby's friends at McMenamin's for pitchers before watching the Blazers from the Skybox and getting all the free beer I wanted.

Not good for all the things I need to accomplish tomorrow.

Blazers won at the buzzer. That rocked.

But still not good. Not good at all.

Cancer Sucks

I made a promise to myself that my blog wouldn't a place for me to be a bummer, but mostly that was just so I wouldn't come and bitch about nothing. So THIS LINK about Cora isn't exactly the kind of thing I enjoy sharing, but another family with a sick baby that needs prayers is more important than anything I can think of.

Also, I just found out from a very dear friend, A - my first friend in Portland to be exact - that his wife has breast cancer. She is only 33 years old and the mother of a 5 year old daughter and 2 year old son. She discovered the tumor after a 4-wheeling accident caused some strange swelling, which led to the discovery of the tumor. Not many people get to say that a 4-wheeling accident saved their life, but this may just be the case for J. It is Stage 2 and has not metasticized to her bones or organs, so things could definitely be worse. Please keep them in your prayers, along with Cora, as they take their next steps.

Don't miss your chance!

Katy is having a giveaway, but you'd better hurry because it ends tonight!

Click here!

Update from the New Floor

Bad news: The women's bathroom on 8 is on the OTHER SIDE of the floor.What a pain.

Good news: There are three stalls.

Why is this good news, you ask? Allow me to explain.

I've indicated in the past that I have a complicated Potty Process.This process benefits greatly from the existence of a 3rd stall, which was not the case on floor 6. The existence of the 3rd stall allows for a great deal more anonymity if pooing (or accidental toots) were to occur.

Someone entering an empty bathroom will inevitably take either the 1st stall or the 3rd. Nobody willingly takes the middle. I've done studies. If a second person enters, they also will take either the 1st or 3rd stall (whichever is not occupied). It is highly unlikely that traffic to the potty will be so great that the middle stall will be utilized. Of course, this is entirely dependent on the time of day. The lunch hour is particularly troublesome.

The middle stall then serves as a cushion, so to speak, and protects any patrons experiencing accidental toots or unavoidable poos (hey, they happen) from Shoe Identification.

So, while I'm saddened that I have to walk further to get to the toilet, my overall Potty Process has been greatly improved with the move toFloor 8. You may breathe easy now, My Followers. I know you have been worried.

Other notes from Floor 8:

Bad news: Inexplicably, Floor 8 has white noise piping through the PA System. This is disappointing in that I constantly feel like I'm on a 9-hour flight, but never seem to land anywhere. Also, like traveling, this noise makes me very tired.

Good news: Nobody can hear me whispering on the phone to my co-workerson other floors.

Movin On Up To The East Side

By movin’ on up, I mean to the 8th floor. And by east side, I mean, well…the east side of the building. Yea for me, I’ll be somewhat close to a semi-good view of Mt. Hood.

I’ve been sitting in the same place basically since I started working here and working with the same group of people. Now, I’ll be on a different floor working with different people. I’m sorta bummed, but I think this move will put me in line for bigger and better things. And, I’ll be working with a few people that I used to work with, so I’m pumped about that.

Farty McFarterson gave me a hug earlier and told me how much she’s going to miss me. When I hug people, I really like to give HUGS – not that leaning thing thats the hug version of the air-kiss. But, to be honest, I was afraid that if I gave Farty my usual hug, she just might gas-out or poop her pants. I wanted to tell her how much I’ll miss her too because she gave me something to laugh about every afternoon following her lunch, but I didn’t. Oh well. I’m sure there will be something else to make me giggle.

In unrelated news, I hear that Madonna is dating Jesus. No small irony there. But, that got me to thinking….

Just what happened to Madonna???

I understand that everyone has bad angles and she clearly wasn't going for a glamour shot. But those cheekbones just aren't natural.

More later from the high-rent district.

Tuesday's Gone With The Wind

Tuesday passed away. Makes me feel really stupid for writing that last post about Jessica Simpson. Such bigger things going on in this world.

I've had this song in my head since reading about Tuesday's passing.

Many, many prayers going out for this little girl and her family who will never know how many lives they've touched.

Dear Jessica,

You might want to watch this video.

Now, listen, I’m not here to criticize and I really only have a couple of things to say about this…

Let me begin by saying you look great. Bad outfit and all. Because let’s face it you probably haven’t gained a substantial amount of weight. Your stylist just took you down the wrong road with that terrible outfit (you DID consult your stylist first, right? Right?). And even if you had gained 15 pounds, you’d still be thinner than a good 60% of the women in this country.

Here’s my problem – and it’s not really your fault. But, the celebrities coming forward in your defense? What a bunch of windbags. Don’t get me wrong, I love me some celebrities. But they really need to be mindful of what their purpose is. To entertain us. Not to starve themselves into nothingness, thereby providing the rest of us with lovely body image issues, and then get all touchy when WE criticize THEM for not maintaining the standard that they use to make us feel like SHIT. Talk about wanting your rice cake and eating it, too.

And the worst one defending you? Your sister. She got all pissy and indignant that people are criticizing the way you look and went so far as to inject Barack Obama’s inauguration into it (huh?) and the current state of the world to highlight how ridiculous it is that people would be discussing how you look. Maybe you should remind your sister that looks were SO IMPORTANT to her that she now has a completely different nose and chin. To each his own. I really think Surgically Enhanced Ashlee is much prettier than Regular Ashlee and I’ve said before that if someone offered me a nose job, I’d take it… But you won’t find me being a hypocrite about it.

One last thing: Wear black. It’s very slimming. (With the exception, of course, for that tank top you were wearing. What were you thinking?!?!)

Sincerely,
KDK, Chief Steward
The Something In The Glass Household